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You will lose more than your job
If you lose your hearing, you lose everything. And there's more than one way to lose it. Don't treat this as a big joke.

Gags
They are tasteless and trashy but we don't care. Please keep sending them

 
Something to offend everyone
 
What is a Yankee?
The same as a quickie, but a guy can do it alone.

What is the difference between a Harley and a Hoover?
The position of the dirt bag.

Why is divorce so expensive?
Because it's worth it.

What do you call a smart blonde?
A golden retriever.

What do lawyers use for birth control?
Their personalities.

What's the difference between a girlfriend and wife?
20 kgs.

What's the difference between a boyfriend and husband?
45 minutes.

What's the fastest way to a man's heart?
Through his chest with a sharp knife.

Why do men want to marry virgins?
They can't stand criticism.

Why is it so hard for women to find men that are sensitive, caring, and good-looking?
Because those men already have boyfriends.

What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog?
After a year, the dog is still excited to see you.

What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying?
The same urge that makes dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving.

A brunette, a blonde, and a redhead are all in year 9.
Who has the biggest boobs?
The blonde, because she's 18.

What's the difference between a porcupine and a police car?
A porcupine has the pricks on the outside.

What did the blonde say when she found out she was pregnant?
"Are you sure it's mine?"

Why does Mike Tyson cry during sex?
Pepper spray will do that to you  ..

Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?
Breasts don't have eyes.

What would you call it when an Italian has one arm shorter than the other?
A speech impediment.

What's the difference between an Australian zoo and a English zoo?
An Australian zoo has a description of the animal on the front of the cage along with... "a recipe.."

How do you get a sweet little 80-year-old lady to say the F... word?
Get another sweet little 80-year-old lady to yell *BINGO*!

What's the difference between a northern USA fairytale and a southern USA fairytale?
A Northern fairytale begins "Once upon a time..."
A southern fairytale begins "Y'all ain't gonna believe this shit."

Why is there no Disneyland in China ?
No one's tall enough to go on the good rides.
 

 
Information is supplied in the best of faith (errors and omissions excepted). Contributions are provided by independent authors that include manufacturers, wholesalers, retailers and the public (so it's mostly based on gossip, fabrication, innuendo and a healthy smattering of lies). You read these pages at your own peril. We make no guaranties about their authenticity and accept no liability for the content. It is certainly not intended as a reflection of opinion or offer from Gear Plus. Neither GearPlus, nor any of the partners, associates, persons interested in GearPlus are able to give any warranty or representation as to the accuracy of the material contained in these pages, or it's applicability to any particular circumstances. Readers are advised to make their own enquiries and/or take professional advice as to the accuracy of the contents of such material and/or it's applicability to any particular circumstances. In short - ALL ONUS IS ON YOU. But, if you happen to notice anything that is not quite kosher, please don't just chat about it with your buddies, help us by reporting the offenders and sending the correct info. Thankyou.
 
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